I rarely post or speak of my life experiences on social media but in honour of Father’s Day weekend and missing my Dad…please read, it could save a life.
Men are four times more likely to die by suicide than women. Some of you may or may not know, 10.5 months ago I lost my Father to suicide. I am not mad or embarrassed, but every day my heart breaks a bit more from missing him.
Suicide is not a dirty little secret
Years ago, my Dad and I had a discussion around suicide and that there is always someone to listen. However, honestly, sometimes there isn’t someone there, people are too busy or tired; we all have those days, and I know I myself have encountered. We need to make time, educate yourselves on the signs and be there to listen or at a minimum support a person in seeking help. There is no shame in seeking help. I see a social worker (therapist) regularly, and without her, I’m not sure where I would be, and she has helped me manage my suicidal thoughts, it may feel there are no other options but there is. Even if you have the support of your regular therapist you may feel the need for additional support between sessions.
Loss from suicide – I wouldn’t wish it on anyone; death by suicide is complex, it’s tragic. Hopefully many of you won’t experience, but unfortunately, you likely will have someone in your life that will be directly affected by suicide. In my journey, few people have shown support through all the ups and downs (thank you to those few), those you thought were family will end up not being, your circle gets much smaller (mine cut in half). I don’t blame those people, I believe they just don’t know what to do, or they try to minimize the grief or ignore it all together and think it will go away….well it won’t, I am living proof. Take time to understand your suicide grief and support as best you can.
If you are going through grief and not getting support, separate yourself from those who are unsupportive, look after you and get the help you need, this is your time. I need the time to heal, to cry, to be angry to mourn my loss.
Today over 10 people in Canada will die from suicide.
Please make an effort to start talking about suicide with your friends, family, children…
I don’t want your sympathy, I want your awareness. Suicide and mental health are not dirty little secrets. They should not be hidden in the dark. We need to talk about suicide and mental health. If talking could have save one life, maybe it could have saved my Dad’s life.
If you or someone you know talks to you about suicide please reach out for help now.