Why marriage counseling?
Our society has created a lot of myths about adulthood, relationships and marriage counseling. These myths are played out everywhere. We hear them in our childhood, in the media, at school an when we talk with friends.
- “Grow up. Be a man.”
- “You can handle it. Suck it up.”
- “You’re an independent woman. You don’t need a partner.”
- “Your marriage is really messed if you need marriage counseling.”
- “Counseling is for people with real problems.”
We know children need close attachment to a parent in order to grow up emotionally healthy. Through research over the past 15 years, a tremendous amount has been learned about relationships. We are social beings. We need to be connected to one another. It turns out adults need the same kind of attachment that young children do. Belonging, being loved, and cared for is a lifelong need. Just like we need food and water to survive.
Most couples wait too long or until their marriage is really struggling before the seek marriage counseling. Most couples wait on average 5-7 years before seeking to speak with a marriage counselor in Ottawa. Sometimes we want to ignore the signs that we need marriage counseling. It’s painful to admit we don’t trust our partner anymore, we see our relationship looking more like roommates then lovers, we avoid any form of intimacy, we argue again and again about the same small issues, and maybe we are fantasizing or engaging in an emotional or full fledged sexual affair with someone else. Sometimes those fantasies become all-engrossing, and there comes a point where one side may turn to pornography to soothe them. Unfortunately, this can often turn to addiction, one that requires porn addiction therapy to work back from alongside other forms of relationship counseling.
Our marriage counseling here at Family-Therapy is based on the science of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT). Much of our approach to couples therapy is based on the outstanding work done by Dr. Sue Johnson. Research shows a 75% long term success for couples that embark on an EFT marriage counseling.
Through EFT marriage counselling in Ottawa, you will gain a deep understanding of the negative patterns that exist in your relationship between you and your partner. With the help of your marriage counselor, you will both learn to recognize and stop these negative patterns, and create new patterns of connection, empathy and understanding. We’re not here to assign blame to anyone. We offer marriage counseling in a safe and nonjudgmental environment so you can your partner can stop the fighting and rebuild your relationship. Most couples wait too long before seeking marriage counseling in Ottawa. Don’t let your marriage become another divorce statistic.